On This Dust of Words

Somehow Sunday is always a day wherein my creativity starts to kick in. Sunday is my day of creative sanctuary. I've made two wonderful written work discoveries since last night but today I'll post this one because it is my favorite of the two.

This essay was written by Professor John Feltiner found in a back issue of Standford Magazine. I was searching for material in the web that could tell me more about the story of Elizabeth Wiltsee. I ran into her on Marie's blog where she featured the screening dates of an independent film entitled "This Dust of Words" by Bill Rose.

I have annotated this essay onto the document because I found it quite necessary that my thoughts be right where the quote is.

This Dust of Words

Publish at Scribd or explore others: Academic Work writing artist

Conversations That Did The Trick

I'm sitting at the usual corner Zeteo used to sit in at Starbucks Provost. I ended up deciding to get my hair done so that I can feel a little bit of life and true enough a good 2 hours at the parlor can do the trick.

The 4 hour wait at the LTO Office drained me. I realized my license was due for renewal and got a little bit irritated how I neglected to see that. Now with my car's fender wrecked from last week's accident, I need to process my affidavit for the insurance company to shoulder the cost. All these things cramped in my day today robbed me a little bit of space to think about the stories I've been planning to write since my discoveries last weekend.

Creative repression is worse than constipation.

To compensate, I found entertainment for some of the conversations I've had randomly sprinkled throughout my day.

The Drug Test System Operator

Me: Miss, I noticed that it takes approximately 5 minutes to process 1 person for the new biometrics system that LTO is imposing for all drug tests. Baket ang tagal?

DTSO: Kasi po ma'am I have to connect to the internet because the database system is online. They just implemented it last January and it's the DOH's initiative.

Me: Baket hindi nila dagdagan yung machines para bumilis bilis ang pag-process ninyo?
DTSO: Hindi po kasi namin na-tancha ang volume. Dati we used to be able to process 200 clients now we can only process at most 70.

Me: Wow. That's like a really big decrease. More than 100%!

DTSO: Oo nga po ma'am eh. But they said in 3 years hindi na ganito ka tagal because everybody would already be in the database.
Me: I see. Sana ilagay niyo yung ganyang explanation sa harap para those who are waiting will know what to expect. We've been here for 2 hours na and we're spending another 45 minutes in this cramped little room just to get our finger prints taken.

DTSO: Pa-sensya na po ma'am. By the way, kayo na po susunod.

I stand up and counted 5 minutes till I'm done. I waited for another 30 minutes for the results to be printed out before I got to the Medical test and eventually the claiming of my new license card. What an ordeal. But at least the operator patiently explained the process to me.

Frank Provost Stylist: Dennis Hadap

Dennis: Hi ma'am diba nagpunta na kayo dito before? Kasi nilagay nila na walk-in kayo but I remember you from before.

Me: Yes, I went here about 3 months ago to have my hair relaxed.

Dennis: See, sabi ko na nga ba eh. Don't worry I'll tell them. By the way so you live around here? I have some clients in Ayala Alabang. Parati ako napupunta sa San Jose street.

Me: Oh really? I just live in San Enrique.

Dennis: Ang lapit lang pala! Marami akong client na ma'am. I started in Manila Peninsula and have been a stylist there for about 12 years. I've been in Frank Provost for 9 years. So far nagustuhan ko dito dahil malapit sa'min. Taga Binan Laguna ako.

Me: Wow. Ang tagal mo na pala na stylist! Buti naman you're able to stay here for that long.

Dennis: Ay siempre naman! It's my way to build loyal clients. Importante talaga sa kin ang client relationship. May mga ibang stylist who force clients to do all sorts of treatment even if they don't want it. Hindi nila iniisip na kahit na may pera ang client, they still need to save. Kaya ako, ginagawa ko yung gusto lang talaga ng client. Hindi ko sila pinipilit.

Me: Wow. Buti naman concerned ka sa mga clients mo. Minsan lang yung ganyan.

Dennis: Concerned talaga ako. Hindi naman kasi lahat po revolves around money. Kagaya sa village namin, meron akong mga kapit-bahay doon na gusto magpagawa pero hindi nila ko kayang bayaran. Okay lang sa kin kahit hindi nila ako bayaran kaagad. Or kahit paka-inin nalang nila ako. Naiintindihan ko naman na there are some who cannot afford.

Me: That's true. Fulfilling rin ano? When you know that you're able to help those who need your help.

Dennis: Fulfilling talaga ma'am. Kaya happy ako dito. Napapaganda ko yung mga gusto magpaganda chaka napapagaan ko loob nila.

Me: Okay yan ah! Sana ganyan din yung ibang mga stylist. Ano nga pala number mo? Para pagbalik ko dito hahanapin kita.

Dennis: Oh yan po ma'am ang number ko. Salamat po ha ma'am Kathy! (sabay beso)

I have never met a hair stylist who had an awareness for social responsibility. I noticed that what he did say was true. Most stylists would milk you for your money's worth. I was quite pleased to find out that there was someone like him who did his job in such an honorable way. I'm not sure how hair stylists are viewed in this country but today I've found quite a new respect for their profession. They make people feel beautiful and if hair stylists have a good heart like Dennis' then they can make them feel beautiful from the inside-out.

So there goes my day. Slow. Dragging. But with a glossy finish.

A Call To Move the Nation

Shoot To Move the Nation: A tough mandate. 500 photographers rise up to call to capture moving stills of the Dignity of Filipino Workers with all intensity and integrity. On the 6th of February, down to 100 top photographs, over dinner and palpable creative adrenaline, I listened to the animated discussion that revolved around the art as a vehicle to fuel patriotic revival. OPF Chairman, Atty. Jesulito Manalo believes in the great potential of this nation. He believes that the universality of appreciating art and culture is a strong uniting force. “Culture now becomes the means to bring across the message of getting our act together in a powerful contagion that crosses borders and differing standpoints,” He muses.

The battlecry: Liyab Piliipinas: Reigniting passion for the nation, and for this specific project, using art and culture as a platform for advocacy. The contest ran from November 2008 to January 2009. Originally the contest would have ended on December 2008, but due to an incessant flooding of the site’s feedback form, the people at The OPF agreed to a deadline extension.

For a pilot project, many were shocked by the overwhelming response. Executive Director Rinka Romero, when asked how she felt as the entries literally flooded in says, “I was humbled. The results were overwhelming. It made me see that I underestimated the audience, that they were more willing to be involved than I gave them credit for.”

The response was felt even among the staff, and I was told that it came to the point, they were apologetic to Rinka as they came in to herald the delivery of even more entries: (Ma’am, sorry po, may regalo ako sa inyo. Hulaan niyo kung ano).




The top 100 photos waited, laid out on a number of tables around the dinner table and judges Quark Henares, Quincy Castillo, Justice Adolf Azcuna, Steve Tirona and Kidlat Tahimik (who sent in his scores earlier during the day)started to go around the lined up prints to rate each by the criteria: Relevance to theme, Image impact and Creativity.

One of the judges, Steve Tirona, renowned photographer of Manny Pacquiao’s latest victory says of what he would consider a good photograph, "The picture is able to make an impact when it tells a story without words.”



Former Philippine Camera Club President and 3-time winner of the prestigious award: Master Photographer Quincy Castillo says that the shift from traditional film to digital has cost the craft quite a bit. He says, “The main difference between users of the two can be seen in one’s discipline. Developing one film slide used to cost 200 pesos. It takes a photographer to practice discipline of planning his shot before-hand to arrive at a good picture. This is what needs to be retained while enjoying the benefits of convenience that the digital medium of photography brings to the craft.”


I looked around the room and saw the passion that carried the project to its fruition. The photographs were striking. I was awed by the fact that one of the entries I saw came from an 18 year old. I saw different messages that communicated the various images of the Dignity of the Filipino Worker. Some photographs showed strength. Some showed craftsmanship. Some showed cheerful candor. Some showed courage. The top 100 collections showed the different settings of a Filipino at work. The agricultural worker. The professional. The family provider. The builder of highways.


But all in all what I saw in the results of the contest was the ability of Filipinos to exist in a variety of settings. To excel in a variety of fields. To remain bright eyed and enthusiastic no matter what the toil. To keep in productive perseverance no matter what the pressure.



The Outlooke Pointe Foundation highlights this evolution in reviving the use of photography as a craft that empowers, rebuilds and unleashes the passion inherent in every Filipino to take what has been given us from colonialism to slavery, from battle scars to victory and use what has once imprisoned us to be the very experience that sets us free.


___________

pictures by Javi Cabanes

The Sky Smiled Tonight

The last time it happened was recorded to be at 1818. The next time it is predicted to happen is in 247 years. I deeply regret not having taken a photograph when I was already staring at the scene because it was right above me.

The sky looked like twilight. Faint hues of light glowing from just above the horizon. Darker shades of blue hovering above making the crescent moon glow with much charm upon velvet.

It's an awesome phenomenon and it makes me wonder about the Universe's Hand and how it seems to fingerpaint the sky with much beauty like this.

Walking with Joel Osteen

Image by Tonyç via Flickr

I've finally gotten my mindset right about exercise. I always told myself that as soon as I get a hang of managing my spiritual health, the next thing would be my body. So yes, it's finally here, after 31 years. The awareness that I need to take care of my physical health too. :)

I guess this realization came because I recently learned about my grandmother's amputation. Gangrene spread from her feet to her legs because of poor blood circulation. Diabetes complicated the healing process.

I realized that I didn't want to grow old that way and experience a lot of these complications. So I got out of bed today and dressed up. Put my earphones on and started with Priscilla Ahn's Dream. I like walking in the morning to good music and good weather. It sort of cleanses all the discomfort from my body and it becomes easier to shrug off the restlessness that clings all over me. The heat was just right and there was a bit of cool leftover from the dawn.

I decided to listen to a podcast so that I will be more focused and not just aimlessly walk around street corners without a purpose. Listening to encouraging podcasts help. I was even tearing somewhere in between because Joel Osteen was talking about keeping dreams alive.

It doesn't matter how long it takes to chase your dream, just keep at it because keeping at it keeps you productive and that keeps you living with purpose and with purpose you get passion. It doesn't matter if you have a dream that died, dream another dream. It doesn't matter if you can no longer do what you used to do, just do what you CAN do.

There are a lot of things that I can no longer do. And walking for long periods of time is one of them. But surprisingly, I brisked walked for 45 minutes non-stop with Joel Osteen's Southern Twang playing in my ear. I'm not sure how far I was able to go, all I know is that I finished the podcast and went up a steep road without hating how my muscles started to ache after.

Exercise and I never mixed but I suppose finding a creative way to do something that suits me better will get me up an running for it. It's a small win. 45 minutes. But it's got a big dream in the making attached to it.

_______________

Benefits of walking

Walking for fitness can help you achieve a number of important health benefits. For example, you can:

• Reduce your risk of a heart attack. Walking keeps your heart healthy by lowering low-density lipoprotein (LDL) cholesterol (the "bad" cholesterol) and raising high-density lipoprotein (HDL) cholesterol (the "good" cholesterol). A regular walking program also reduces your risk of developing high blood pressure, a factor that also contributes to heart disease.
• Manage your blood pressure. If you already have high blood pressure, walking may reduce it.
• Reduce your risk of developing type 2 diabetes. Regular exercise reduces your risk of developing type 2 diabetes. If you're a woman, overweight and at a high risk of diabetes, walking can improve your body's ability to process sugar (glucose tolerance).
• Manage your diabetes. If you already have type 2 diabetes, taking part in a regular walking program can improve your body's ability to process sugar, lower your blood sugar, reduce your risk of heart disease and help you live longer.
• Manage your weight. Walking burns calories, which can help you manage your weight. For example, middle-aged women who walk more than 10,000 steps a day have lower levels of body fat than do women who are less active.
• Manage stress and boost your spirits. Going for a brisk walk is a great way to reduce stress. Regular walking also can reduce feelings of depression and anxiety.
• Stay strong and active. As you get older, walking for physical fitness can prevent falls, help you stay mobile and maintain your independence.
  
  

Prepare yourself before you go walking

Take time to prepare yourself to prevent injuries, such as blisters on your feet or muscle pain.

Wear walking shoes and comfortable, protective clothing
Before you set out, be sure to select comfortable footwear. Also dress in loosefitting, comfortable clothing and in layers if you need to adjust to changing temperature. If you walk outside, choose clothes appropriate for the weather. Avoid rubberized materials, as they don't allow perspiration to evaporate. Wear bright colors or reflective tape after dark so that motorists can see you.

Warm up
Spend about five minutes walking slowly to warm up your muscles. You can walk in place if you want. Increase your pace until you feel warm. Warming up your muscles reduces your risk of injury.

Stretch
After warming up, stretch your muscles for about five minutes before walking. Include the calf stretch, quadriceps stretch, hamstring stretch, lower back flexion stretch and chest stretch.

Getting started: Design a program that works for you

To help ensure your success:

Start slow and easy
If you're a seasoned walker, keep doing what you're doing. If you've been inactive and tire easily, it's best to start slow and easy. At first, walk only as far as or as fast as you find comfortable. If you can walk for only a few minutes, let that be your starting point. For example, you might try short daily sessions of three to five minutes and slowly build up to 15 minutes twice a week. Then, over several weeks' time, you can gradually work your way up to 30 minutes of walking five days each week.

Use proper technique to avoid injury and setbacks
Walking is a great exercise because it's so simple to do. But if your posture is poor or your movements exaggerated, you increase your risk of injury.

Measure the intensity of your workout
As you walk, measure the intensity. Knowing your level allows you to increase the intensity to maximize your workout or slow down to avoid overdoing it. You have these options:

• Talk test. If you're so out of breath that you can't carry on a conversation with the person you're walking with, you're probably walking too fast and should slow down.
• Borg scale. This method is a self-assessment of your perceived exertion. You rate how hard you think you're working on a scale that ranges from 6 (no exertion) to 20 (maximal effort). Aim for at least moderate intensity (12 to 14) as you walk.
• Monitor your heart rate (pulse). To find out if you're exercising within the range of your target heart rate, stop exercising to check your pulse manually at your wrist (radial artery) or neck (carotid artery). Another option is to wear an electronic device that displays your heart rate.

Keep track of your progress
Keeping a record of how many steps you take, the distance you walk and how long it takes can help you see where you started from and serve as a source of inspiration. Just think how good you'll feel when you see how many miles you've walked each week, month or year.

Record these numbers in a walking journal you create for yourself or log them in a spreadsheet on your computer. Another option is to use an electronic device to calculate time and distance for you. Options include:

• Pedometers. These devices, which you usually attach to your belt or waistband, detect body motion and count your footsteps, displaying the number of steps on a small screen.

  Although many pedometers have extra features, such as displaying calories burned and the distance walked or run, you may want to begin by using its primary feature - counting steps.

• High-tech devices. Devices that use GPS satellite technology cost more than pedometers do, but they can track the total and current distance you walk, and even calculate your speed or pace. You may have to program these devices. Some allow you to download stored data to your computer as a way of keeping track of your progress. You wear these high-tech devices on your wrist or attached to your waistband, shoe or arm.

Cool down after each walking session
To reduce stress on your heart and muscles, end each walking session by walking slowly for about five minutes. Then, repeat your stretches.

- article from Revolution Health.com

The SkyAngel Cowbow Reaches Manila

It's another cloudy Friday but all warmed up by this video I found in Adi's Tumblr. It's a video of a child named Logan who calls up SkyAngel Radio to share something about his cow having to be put down because of a broken back.



I'm moved because of how young he is and how untainted his view about God is. He sure is not a theologian but he knows the truth about God so well.

Be Blessed!

Tumbling in Tumblr

I am currently captivated by the little internet nook called Tumblr. I was reading through some pages and found a news article on David Karp. I found him such a genius for having been able to create a site like Tumblr. Anyway on to why I like Tumblr.

I like it because it's neat. It's organized. It's not complicated to use. It actually feels like Multiply because it allows you to click buttons according to what you want to post. Whether it be text, photos, audio, video. I like the quotes feature because I haven't encountered that in any of the sites I have joined online. It also feels like Facebook and Twitter because you can just post short snippets of your day. Even if the interface is designed with an actual textbox as opposed to Facebook and Twitter's one liner space, there is that feeling of finiteness which makes you post things in a concise manner.

I stumbled on an article in Wikepedia that defines this activity we call blogging.

A blog (a contraction of the term "Web log") is a Web site, usually maintained by an individual with regular entries of commentary, descriptions of events, or other material such as graphics or video. Entries are commonly displayed in reverse-chronological order. "Blog" can also be used as a verb, meaning to maintain or add content to a blog.

Many blogs provide commentary or news on a particular subject; others function as more personal online diaries. A typical blog combines text, images, and links to other blogs, Web pages, and other media related to its topic. The ability for readers to leave comments in an interactive format is an important part of many blogs. Most blogs are primarily textual, although some focus on art (artlog), photographs (photoblog), sketches (sketchblog), videos (vlog), music (MP3 blog), audio (podcasting), which are part of a wider network of social media. Micro-blogging is another type of blogging, one which consists of blogs with very short posts. As of December 2007, blog search engine Technorati was tracking more than 112 million blogs.^[1] With the advent of video blogging, the word blog has taken on an even looser meaning — that of any bit of media wherein the subject expresses his opinion or simply talks about something.

I've started blogging as early as 2004. I remember starting up in Oprah's discussion boards and Online Gratitude Journal. Then I moved on to Xanga.com because it was the first blogging site that allowed for an easy way to connect with other people. Then I moved to Multiply and Blogger and Facebook. I also tried Live Journal and Wordpress.

Each Blog hosting site has a different feel to it. Different personalities. From my experience Xanga gave me a taste of intimate online relationships. Most of my online blog friends come from Xanga. Multiply on the other hand gave me a taste of connecting with my physical circle of friends in a more meaningful way. The private life becomes a little bit more exposed as Multiply allowed a sharing of a variety of mediums to express how your life is going for a day. Blogger feels more like a professional blog where entries have to be quite thorough and targetted to a particular audience of topic. I quit Live Journal and Wordpress because I had a difficult time navigating through them.

In all my years of blogging I find myself to be moving around a lot. Never really staying in one place too long. It's almost as if the chapters of my life move internet addresses according to how it feels or what phase I am in. Private experiences are logged in Xanga. Experiences I am willing to share with the public are logged on to Blogger or Multiply.

I've decided now to focus only a few sites to concentrate on full blogging activity. Aside from simple information sharing, it becomes an activity of reflection and a writing exercise. I've veered away from full length blogging on social networking sites because I didn't want to limit myself to the network that I knew. There is a kind of freedom in anonymity and it becomes more interesting for me to keep writing when I don't know who is reading.

In that way, writing is not only an act of reflection but also a discovery.

However, the fluctuating spurts of creativity has bogged me down quite so that the pressure to keep the words flowing gracefully actually ended up paralyzing the stream of consciousness that digs the words out of my head. That's when I started looking for an alternative.

Micro-blogging became an option. I started finding the value of micro-blogging when I resurrected my Facebook pages. But again, I wanted something that veered away from social networking especially when it was concentrated only on a particular circle. Twitter found its way on my list and finally Tumblr.

I have to thank January Warrior for sharing it with me.

So Tumblr.com is a little corner in the infinite space of the Web that draws out spurts of meaning from someone who needs mental de-cluttering. The easy to navigate pages and the creative interface archive gives me a feel of smallness, intimacy and meaning. Tumblr.com is quiet because discussions are kept to a bare minimum. There seems to be an atmosphere of respect and even friendly reverence for the freedom of expression.

Another Wikepedia article defines tumbling as such:

A tumblelog (also known as a tlog or tumblog) is a variation of a blog that favors short-form, mixed-media posts over the longer editorial posts frequently associated with blogging. Common post formats found on tumblelogs include links, photos, quotes, dialogues, and video. Unlike blogs, tumblelogs are frequently used to share the author's creations, discoveries, or experiences while providing little or no commentary.

A tumblelog is a quick and dirty stream of consciousness, a bit like a remaindered links style linklog but with more than just links.

So when the clutter stack becomes too overwhelming for spring cleaning and de-blogging, I'm off to the Tumblr hideaway.

The Flight of Leaves

This morning I had a chance to witness an artpiece in the making. Adi Mari finished her piece on birds and finally showed it to me all the way from London.

Art has always been something captivating for me because it allows me to be drawn inside and outside of myself. The focus of art becomes holistic instead of capturing just one aspect about life. Art makes life three dimensional because it forces you to look at reason (the purpose of pursuing the craft) and passion (the desire to pursue the craft). Art becomes the fruit of a journey's essence manifested in tactile form.

This is why I associate art so much with the journey of faith because it takes a lot of faith to keep up with an artistic journey and it takes a lot of artistic appreciation for life to keep up with the challenges of faith.

I have only started to really establish my journey on looking at how parallel faith and art can be. And today this journey is seen in the artpiece that my friend Adi Mari has made.

I'd call this piece The Flight of Leaves. She has used a variety of media to execute the concept of this artwork. It was quite a painstaking process of gluing in real leaves together to cover cardboard patterns of shapes forming a clutter of leaves at the base. I can imagine the gentle gesture of tracing a curve shaped stencil to draw the birds and capture the wings in flight.

She was talking to me about her fascination for birds ever since she moved to London and I surmise that it is because of how her life has always been. Filled with periods of traveling moving from one country to the next to settle into new homes and leave old ones. It's a melancholy journey of one who's barely anchored to maturity. But it is also quite a courageous journey for someone as young as her because it brings her closer to live a life reliant on faith.

I am caught by the flight of the birds which seems to be moving towards me. I can feel the wind from underneath sweeping the leaves up to the air as the wings swoop down to dip and soar up again. I am enchanted by the colored leaves and Adi Mari's hands that fashioned them intricately. The lines of the work are all moving. Much like Adi Mari's spirit. Moving to find the peacefulness of home in changing skies and the shifting of clouds.

It is true. That art is indeed a self-portrait and this piece can perhaps be her signature work because it literally expresses the story in her soul. One of hope despite the constancy of change and the hurried pace towards acceptance. One of faith despite the hurdles that needs to be crossed amidst the change hues and tones the color her life. One of authenticity despite the realities that challenge the meaning of her truth.

the Flight of Leaves

The Cubao X Discovery

The very much awaited trip to Cubao X finally happened last Saturday. I left Alabang around 9am to be sure that I will not tangle myself with a lot of road stress along EDSA. I didn't really know if the area would be open that early but I also took it as an opportunity to explore Cubao again after not having been there in the longest time.

Cubao has a lot of childhood memories for me. Malls like Robinsons Galleria or SM MegaMall weren't open yet when I lived in Pasig. My parents would take me and my sister to Ali Mall during weekends and our favorite fastfood was McDonald's. I remember being so eager to get the newest Happy Meal Toy from pencil cases to lunch boxes and anything that had Ronald McDonald on it.

Things didn't change that much. It was still quite traffic in P. Tuazon street. The presence of Gateway Mall and Shopwise were new and I sort of missed the old Fiesta Carnival that stood in the middle of the shopping arena.

I finally found Cubao X and was happy that there was a parking lot almost right next to it. The old ruins of the Marikina Shoe Expo were very much still standing. Suddenly, I recognized the place from a distant memory. I remember buying old school shoes there because they were cheaper than those sold in the mall.

The day was cloudy and the breeze was a little cold. It was perfect for walking around the city. As expected, Cubao X was empty except for a few shops that were open early. I didn't get the names of all of the shops but I was especially drawn to the antique shop that was located at the center of the corner. Filled with luscious green plants from the terrace, I was immediately lured inside to peek at the wonderful treasures that other people left behind. I was quite thrilled to see a lot of books and old trinkets. I was looking forward to see Remy's Thrift Shop but unfortunately it wasn't open yet when I got there. So I walked around Cubao for the meantime and found myself sitting down on the sidewalk outside the Ali Mall entrance to just take everything in.

I went back after lunch and was happy to see most of the shops open. I was able to purchase great finds. A bag of clothes purchased in the "ukay-kay" place: 5 pieces of clothing (2 dressy tank tops, a bolero, a blouse and a long gypsy skirt) all for 500 pesos. A bag of second hand books: Flights of Love by Bernard Schlink, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho and The Waves by Virginia Woolf all for 450 pesos. And lastly, my most interesting find for the day: a porcelain doll that was packaged in a vintage travel box (if there was a vintage version of kaboodles that would by my closest description) for 480 pesos.

There's one simple thing I realized in this short trip. Discoveries happen because you make an active choice to seek and not just wait stagnantly for an opportune time. I realized how much of my living in Manila has been so unexplored and have silently made a resolution to change my mindset about willingly exploring places that resonate with my own inner journey of authenticity.  In so doing, I am awakened to the truth of who I am.  A Filipino Woman. Rediscovering the joy of finding out what it means to realize how good it is to find home. Revived with renewed passion for the Filipino Nation.

On Google Analytics

I recently signed up for Google Analytics because I wanted to try and see the hit rates coming into my blog. I am just simply amazed at how technology can capture information that once was impossible to acquire.

Here's a map of London. Captured by Google Analytics on where my visitors come from.


The report highlights in darker orange hues that the cities are Kensington and Wallington. I'm assuming this is you Slick. :-P

Just one of those little pieces of information that amaze me daily.

Following Your Personal Legend

This is one confirmation for me today that I'm heading the right direction. :) Most of the time what hinders me in believing in my dreams is my lack of hope. Recently I realized how powerful the virtue of hope is. Hope is the substance of faith. One who hopes, lives differently.

What are you hoping for?

__________

When Joseph Campbell, today’s most famous scholar of mythology (and author of the excellent “The Power of Myth”) created the expression “follow your blessing,” he was reflecting an idea that seems to be very appropriate right now. In “The Alchemist,” this same idea is called “Personal Legend.”

Alan Cohen, a therapist who lives in Hawaii, is also working on this theme. He says that in his lectures he asks those who are dissatisfied with their work and seventy-five percent of the audience raise their hands. Cohen has created a system of twelve steps to help people to rediscover their “blessing” (he is a follower of Campbell):

1] Tell yourself the truth: draw two columns on a sheet of paper and in the left column write down what you would love to do. Then write down on the other side everything you’re doing without any enthusiasm. Write as if nobody were ever going to read what is there, don’t censure or judge your answers.

2] Start slowly, but start: call your travel agent, look for something that fits your budget; go and see the movie that you’ve been putting off; buy the book that you’ve been wanting to buy. Be generous to yourself and you’ll see that even these small steps will make you feel more alive.

3] Stop slowly, but stop: some things use up all your energy. Do you really need to go that committee meeting? Do you need to help those who do not want to be helped? Does your boss have the right to demand that in addition to your work you have to go to all the same parties that he goes to? When you stop doing what you’re not interested in doing, you’ll realize that you were making more demands of yourself than others were really asking.

4] Discover your small talents: what do your friends tell you that you do well? What do you do with relish, even if it’s not perfectly well done? These small talents are hidden messages of your large talents.

5] Begin to choose: if something gives you pleasure, don’t hesitate. If you’re in doubt, close your eyes, imagine that you’ve made decision A and see all that it will bring you. Now do the same with decision B. The decision that makes you feel more connected to life is the right one - even if it’s not the easiest to make.

6] Don’t base your decisions on financial gain: the gain will come if you really do it with enthusiasm. The same vase, made by a potter who loves what he does and by a man who hates his job, has a soul. It will be quickly sold (in the first case) or will stay on the shelves (in the second case).

7] Follow your intuition: the most interesting work is the one where you allow yourself to be creative. Einstein said: “I did not reach my understanding of the Universe using just mathematics.” Descartes, the father of logic, developed his method based on a dream he had.

8] Don’t be afraid to change your mind: if you put a decision aside and this bothers you, think again about what you chose. Don’t struggle against what gives you pleasure.

9] Learn how to rest: one day a week without thinking about work lets the subconscious help you, and many problems (but not all) are solved without any help from reason.

10] Let things show you a happier path: if you are struggling too much for something, without any results appearing, be more flexible and follow the paths that life offers. This does not mean giving up the struggle, growing lazy or leaving things in the hands of others - it means understanding that work with love brings us strength, never despair.

11] Read the signs: this is an individual language joined to intuition that appears at the right moments. Even if the signs point in the opposite direction from what you planned, follow them. Sometimes you can go wrong, but this is the best way to learn this new language.

12] Finally, take risks! the men who have changed the world set out on their paths through an act of faith. Believe in the force of your dreams. God is fair, He wouldn’t put in your heart a desire that couldn’t come true.

- Paulo Coelho Blogpost November 12, 2008

The Red Boots Journey

the red boots journey

This picture got 13 views and 7 comments in Flickr. My highest rating to date since I resurrected my Flickr back up about 2 weeks ago. That Flickr account has been there for 5 years or so but I never really ended up using it because of rising social networks like Multiply and Facebook. Somehow, I've forgotten what it felt like to be anonymous to the internet public. Somehow, I've forgotten what it's like to appreciate the work of a stranger and to look forward to exciting discoveries from random people. Somehow, I've also forgotten how affirming it felt like to get feedback from people I don't know.

This photo was taken in ParadiZoo Cavite. It's an hour and a half drive from Alabang. More pictures that I've taken are in my Flickr Album. But I am specifically fond of this picture because of how it was a moment that was just there, waiting to be captured.

I like the whitewashed paint on the steps. These are steps to a small house located in the Zoo. The boots where just there as if somebody left them. I like how the boots stand out against the whitewash paint. It's a charming sight and it reminds me of cozy walks on a quiet afternoon.

Paulo Coelho in Filipino

A chat with Katchig Mouradin yesterday taught me to find my treasure in my own backyard. It is true. Most Filipinos seldom find value in their own country. The glitter of far away lands is too gravitational a pull that we find ourselves scattered all over the place without any true anchor to a home. To an identity.

Thus the ever pervading struggle of the Filipino to remain authentic. But authentic to what nature? The answer escapes me because sadly even I cannot truly say what nature is this. However, there is no struggle born without a good fight. And I suppose that is what I know of each and every Filipino that's walked their lives parallel to the nation's history. The fact that every Filipino is born with a warrior's heart.

So here's my little attempt to do some weeding in my own little garden. Learning to love the tongue of my motherland as it helps me understand deeper the truths conveyed by an author who knows the authentic nature of his soul and moves to arouse authenticity in others.

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A true warrior of light knows that every garden has its own mysteries, which only the patient hand of the gardener can unravel. (Paulo Coelho's Quote for October 30)

Ang totoong Mandirigma ng Liwanag alam na ang mga hardin ay may kanya-kanyang misterio na ang masipag at pasensyong hardinero lang ang nakaka-intindi.

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So it seems that we are living in a culture of fear.

Before it was the terrorist attacks and now we see this economic crisis that engulfs the whole world.

My point is that we understand less and less what is happening. Personally, the more I read about this crisis the more I get lost.

Not only that: I’m reading about Pakistan, Afghanistan, Irak and the Middle East and it seems that people are losing control. When this happens we see the rise of a culture of fear. And this is what I want you to share: do you feel we are living a moment where fear is being used against us?

Don’t you have the feeling that besides our personal fear, there’s an atmosphere of doubt that is imposing this world of crisis to us? (Paulo Coelho on the Culture of Fear)

Namumuhay tayo sa isang kultura ng pangangamba.

Dati puro mga attack ng terrorista ngayon naman nakikita natin ang crisis sa economy ng buong mundo.

Ang punto ko ay paunti ng paunti ang naiintindihan natin sa mga nangyayari. Sa totoo lang para sa kin, habang parami ng parami ang nababasa ko, mas lalo akong nalilito.

Hindi lang yun: nagbabasa ako tungkol sa Pakistan, Afghanistan, Irak at ang Middle East at mukhang nawawalan ng control ang mga tao. Pag-nangyayari ito lalong gumagrabe ang pangangamba. Pero ito ang gusto ko malaman sa inyo: sa tingin niyo ba na namumuhay tayo sa panahon na kung saan ang ating pangangaba ay ginagagamit para mas-takutin pa tayo?

Hindi niyo ba napapansin bukod sa ating sariling pangangamba, merong pakiramdam ng pagka-alinlangan na syang naglalapat nitong crisis sa atin?

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Finding A Sidewalk to Breath

When you are exceedingly inhibited out of your wits (especially in the corporate world) there are those moments when you choose to play a little bit of hooky. The truth is, I have been wanting to just play hooky without having to feel guilty for the longest time. The repressions of artistic inclinations show when even on an idle work day, you begin to ache to be somewhere else aside from the four corners of my little office corner.

So I gave myself a break and succumbed to the hunger for liberation and decided to go out for a walk at 10am in the morning. I didn't know where I wanted to go. My first thought was to find a nearest magazine stand which I remember would be in RCBC Tower just a few blocks away from my building. They had a stall inside their food court that allowed for momentary reading. But when I walked out the building I was drawn somewhere else. I wandered aimlessly and decided to take some pictures with my Sony Ericsson phone camera. Walking the length of the street I ended up in a park.

What I relief, I told myself. What an exceedingly extreme relief. Sometimes when everything just needs to be let loose, all it takes is a little vacant space on a friendly sidewalk for my heart to rest. I'm quite glad I found one today.

More pictures in this album.

Skyway Epiphanies of a Reluctant Motorist

I go up the Metro Manila Skyway everyday to and from work. I have to bear the ever rising toll prices of this route because the traffic below going towards the South is stressfully unbearable. I have never really quite learned how to bear horrible traffic like most motorists do. But who does?

One thing I've learned how to do while driving is take phone camera pictures. Most of the time I get drawn to a nice sunset or the mysterious glow of a full moon. Since the skyway stretches a length of 10 kilometers, there is a long expanse of road that allows my mind to wander off and unwind from the strenuous knots that tie up in my brain after a long day's work.

The other day I saw the sky with a glorious red violet hue. Slightly dark patches of gray clouds feathered the light coming from the setting sun. The ramp leading up to skyway felt like an entrance to a majestic mansion that eagerly welcomed my homebound ride. Quite a liberating view after seeing tall concrete buildings enclose my day like bars of a huge cage.

Brief moments such as this become breathing spaces for day worker like me hobbling hour after hour to fulfill the necessities of survival and daily living. I suppose it's a quiet miracle when I keep my eyes open to witness moments greeting me like this.

Finding Spirit in the Financial Crisis

I've been running into this topic for the past week. I cannot claim to be the most informed person in the world. I am always not up to date about current events in whatever aspect of life except if it's about the Church. Yes, I probably am a self-proclaimed recluse. But there are reasons and the reasons have helped me realize that it is okay to keep being a recluse as long as I don't become indifferent to the movement of life that I affect around me or are being affected by something I can help alleviate. So I look up once in a while or open my eyes from the moments of contemplative-active living to see what and how everybody is getting along.

I ran into a Facebook Note from my friend Anjani all the way from Holland entitled Global Economic Crisis: A Historic Opportunity for Transformation. and I immediately took note of the word transformation. After having recently attended a forum at the Asian Institute of Management that nitpicked and fed our brains on the causes of this crisis and what one can do to survive it, there was no mention on how it actually is an opportunity for global transformation. Looking at this global crisis in that manner now has moved me to take part of the opportunity of being transformed myself. Hence, keeping myself informed and involved with everything that's got to do with it including how the Church thinks.

In this article I saw in my cousin Pat's blog, he pointed that what endures through all crisis is God.

After all the intellectual debacle of expert economists, politicians, businessmen, housewives or even farmers, in the end there will be no formula for overcoming a depression except the united mindset of goodwill amongst men. Where does all good begin? God. For non-Christians it's begins with other things maybe but the idea of holding on to a collective unifying force greater than all of mankind's capability always arises in the face of all challenges that seem impossible to overcome.

I find it interesting that even the Pope has something affirming to say about what's been troubling corporate giants. It's a comforting thought that even through the stonehearted walls of money making machines, the Spirit finds its way to breath life.

Photography Helps Me Write

I spent my entire lunch break finishing i-mag photography. A Filipino magazine on imaging and the imagination. I was particular interested in the articles that described the creative process of professional photographers because they highlighted the reasons that fuel their passion for this art. As with any art comes the value of craftmanship. Even Joyce Carol Oates author of Faith Like A Writer says, "Withought craft, art remains private. Without art, craft is merely handiwork."

I have pondered upon that statement for more than a month now since I finished reading that book. What it's saying to me is any pursuit of art requires discipline to follow through the perfection of the skill that produces the fruits of the artistic process. Without discipline, the artwork remains mediocre and the easy refusal of the artist to share it to the world. Too much rigor on the other hand removes the liberating experience that is normally shared between artist and artwork leading to a dry spillover of inspiration to enthusiasts.

I took to heart what was said about Marcin Stawiarz' photography, "A picture that carries great emotional impact is more valued than a well composed but literal recording of reality. For proof that one can easily understand, consider the way an inexpert snapshot of a child is treasured by a parent. And when the emotional content of the photograph holds universal truths, it also reaches out to other people across cultural, geographical and time barriers."

Art that moves and stirs the deepest recesses of a human soul is the ultimate purpose. Regardless of how it is taken. How it was made. What kind of post-processing done to it. These things become secondary when we're talking about what makes the image significant. An interview with Judes Echauz former Camera Club of the Philippines president and three time Master Photographer says, "to take better pictures you need only to maximize your 6 megapixel camera and not upgrade to the latest twelve megapixel camera because the genius is not in the pixels, it's in you."

At this point where I am trying to perfect my writing craft and shape up my artistic nature, I am brought back to basics. That true perfection of the art still lies in how I, as an artist, am able to make the creative journey significant not only for myself but for others. Where each creative endeavor is not just a set of tasks that lead to a finished outcome but most importantly a step that leads to the fulfillment of a dream.

Junk Art Pendant from Baguio

Being an avid collector of trinkets that hang around my neck, I couldn't resist this buy. It hung on a stand in the bazaar of Global Pinoy at the Cuenca Park of AAV. Generally made of turquoise and a lot of beads stuck together. Marble. Cat's eye. Ivory. A handmade pendant made in Baguio by local artists who've banded together to pursue their calling. I found it amazing that all their designs were unique. This was just one of them. It was pretty cheap (in my opinion) that such craft and handiwork would range from just 150 to 500 pesos. Considering how it's made by hand, the labor and the imagination takes time to pick up momentum. I remember stringing my own rosary beads for four hours and I felt pretty spent.

Here were people who actually do it for a living and loving it. Not only do they make these, they also hand paint their own shirts and play tribal music. I have never actually met any Baguio artisans except for my cousin Rinka. After I bought the necklace, one of them invited us to stay on to watch them perform tribal music. I've seen these kinds of performers on television but it was quite an experience to see them up close. They had their ethnic instruments with them and one of them started to play this odd looking flute.

It sounded as if I was in the midst of a dark dense forest. I could almost smell the moss on the damp earth. Then the drums started and a nose flute played. One of them sang something in an unknown dialect. His voice felt like it came from somewhere deep inside his gut. Like digging up something from the earth's soil. It was amazing. There was so much passion. The connection between all four musicians was almost spiritual.

I felt my soul unwind there for a bit. A much needed breathing space that was. There is something distinct about tribal bands and regular rock bands. The experience of connecting to a different plane like ushering the breathe of the Spirit was very much present. It reminded me of how I used let my soul breathe through music. Something I don't have much time to spare now. But I am hoping in the next few months I will.

tribal music live

The Girl In The Mirror

This is a photo that I am quite proud of being in. Not because of any grand reason but because this is an attempt of someone who I am really close to, to pick up from where he left off on his artistic journey.

I like this photo because it's stolen. It's not prepared in any way. Stolen shots for me tell me that the photographer has really been observing you. Paying close detail to the moment and waiting for that unveiling of something that can be made witness to an expression, a feeling, a thought, a dream. This photograph shows me something about myself and moves that little place inside me that still remains authentic to my true nature. Vintage. Rustic. Searching. Dreamer. That I am.

The Alley

I've been walking this alley for last couple of weekends now. This is the alley that leads to Rainier's house. I like how it is haunting and dark like that. Rainier's house is just to the right of the lamp post. There is a little gate that leads in. We hang out in the small cozy space just after the little gate. I took this shot last Friday night when we dropped by to supposedly meet them there.

Actually, I really took this shot to practice what Javi just taught me on aperture and shutter speed. Haha. I can't believe that I just got those things down after 3 years of having this camera.

Okay so I am resurrecting my photographer's eye for one purpose. Just to make it clear. It's to help me write better. I have no ambitions of being a photography expert because sometimes I think that taking stolen moments with a phone cam is still better. (Hehe).

This shot was a supposed exercise on learning how to gauge the amount of light that goes inside the lens. Apart from that, I just simply love the night glow that creates the eerie mood from a seemingly misty evening.